A few months later I met with a family who was adopting a group of four sib-lings. One child was with them on a medical visa due to a heart defect, but the other three were still in Haiti. While I visited with them, we talked a lot about adoption, which kept moving back toward adopting in Haiti. Later that evening, I went to a website where their children's photos were located among others at their orphanage. These children touched my heart like no other group of chil-dren. It was then I knew where our child would be found, and I committed to helping this orphanage in Haiti.

We began by collecting formula, diapers, and school supplies. We included our children and when they understood what it meant to be an orphan and to live in an orphanage, our then 5-and-a-half-year-old daughter, Ellen, wanted us to adopt every one of the children. We explained that our family was not ready to adopt, but she was not deterred. She talked often of "when we adopt" and was eager for that day to happen. Soon our then 3-and-a-half-year-old son, John, be-gan telling me that he wanted a brother his size and specified, “No babies.” Ellen did not want to be dethroned as the oldest, however, she did want another sibling near to her age.

Amid the flurry of collecting donations, I saw him. A photo appeared on the website of our son, Nathaniel. I knew it was him the moment I saw his photo. I can not explain how I knew except to say that fireworks went off in my heart and soul. Knowing that my family was not ready to adopt so soon after my hus-band's year of unemployment -- though by this point he had been gainfully em-ployed for a year -- and our youngest was not yet a year old, I kept this informa-tion to myself. I prayed for help and inspiration from the heavens, but my faith was weak. I did not believe that Nathaniel would ever come home to our family.

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