One of the drawbacks to Haitian adoption is the length of time it takes to complete an adoption and have your child home. It seems that many international adoption programs have been getting longer, as well. The difference between other programs and the Haiti program, is how you wait.

Once you have a completed adoption dossier (and sometimes before), you are presented with the referral of a child. Then your paperwork begins its long journey in the Haitian system. With many other international programs, the long wait is for the actual referral. Once a referral has been presented and accepted, completing the adoption process is usually relatively quick. With Haiti, that long wait has a face to it. Nothing is more painful than waiting for an adoption to be final when you know whom you child is. They are constantly on your mind. You wonder if they are eating well, if they are warm enough, safe, healthy, being treated kindly, etc. At times you feel sick with worry and wonder how you can wait another day. Your arms ache to hold your new little one.

After having met our daughters in Haiti, there have been times I felt I would suffocate for wont of their arrival home. Shortly after our first visit to Haiti last July, we had my husband’s family over to watch the video of our daughters. At one point, I had videoed Talley stirring in her sleep. Hearing the sweet, baby noises she made, and watching her rub her eyes, brought a flood of emotions. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I ran upstairs and shut myself in my bedroom. I was sobbing so hard, I was gasping for breath. My chest hurt. I felt like I was going to die. I have had similar moments since meeting our girls; moments where I felt I couldn’t bear another moment without them.

As the famous saying goes, “The waiting is the hardest part.” In the next little while, I’d like to share ideas here for how to make the waiting bearable. Stay tuned.

Continued…